Happy New Year

With each new year comes a new beginning. It is just the next chapter in our lives and we choose how to write it. Some things happen that are beyond our control and sometimes it makes our life take unexpected turns. 2010 has by far been the worst year of my life, but with some very memorable and happy times too.

The biggest event was losing the man who was there for me and was the father that I needed from the time I was 12. I respected him and loved him and on March 29th he was just gone, I felt like my heart had been torn from my chest and stomped on. It left such a huge void and the wound still seems very much fresh and it hurts like hell.

My adopted dad's wife, also died this year. In some ways this was blessing because she was an evil women whom wanted us to not be in their life's, thus we weren't and that is where my DAD (mentioned above came in). The evil wicked stepmother died the beginning of March and my adopted dad was remarried the beginning of August. Now after all these years of having nothing to do with my sisters and I, he wants to be there. There are a lot of emotions behind it. 1) I feel as though I am cheating on the man that I thought of as Dad, 2) there are a lot of hurt feelings that are going to be hard to let go off, just to name a couple. Now I have chosen to live my life with no regrets so I am allowing him back into my life and into my children's lives but there are walls and defenses that will be up for a while. And I feel that I have those rights. As for his new wife, she is a sweetheart and I really like her. She is totally opposite of evil wicked stepmother, she wants us to be a family.

Some of the good things that happened are I finished my Associates Degree, went on a great camping trip just me and Harleyann with the girl scouts to Hershey PA, have made some major changes to help Harleyann in school.

Holidays were good, they were different without Dad here and I suppose they will never feel truly the same. My kids have really kept me going and have really helped me through just by loving me. Jeff has been an amazing help and he has even realized when I just need to de-stress and he has just been amazing.

I am hoping that 2011 is a better year, I have a lot to look forward too...I am looking forward to spending more time with and getting to know better my sister Allison and her family, I will be celebrating 15 years of marriage, my 35th birthday, my kids 2nd & 9th birthdays and many more things.

I know that life can sometimes be hard but we have to go through things to become the people we are and are to become. Plus I have the most amazing family and extended family a women can ask for. I have a ton of support and a ton love surrounding me everyday and I feel truly blessed by the family and friends that I have.

Life can be hard sometimes but it is worth it in the end. Just live life to the fullest and have no regrets, that is what I live by. To all the people in my life Thank You for being there, for being supportive, and for all the love that you give to me.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! Let's make 2011 a great one!!!